We’re back – after one of the most enjoyable trips we have ever had! This past weekend was my first time to visit California and Sally’s second trip to San Francisco… Both of us felt really fortunate to be able to take the time away from work and to have such a great reason to travel to the city, to help Victoria celebrate her nuptials.
I’m really looking forward to sharing photos we took while away, and recapping a few of the places we went (many of which were from the great suggestions you all left on Friday’s post – thank you!) but today I want to muse on the funny notion of “adultness.” As we were packing up our shared hotel room yesterday Sally asked me, “Can you believe we have been in this huge city all weekend, just the two of us, navigating it on our own?” Honestly, I hadn’t really thought about it. But when I paused to think on the subject, it was pretty impressive – two sisters in their mid-twenties, roaming an unfamiliar city and staying in a hotel on their own. The whole things was very “adult” of us. I swear it was the first time it hit me, that holy shit I really am an adult now. When did this happen? I know I have been living in an apartment and paying rent, bills, and a car payment for well over 29 months – but the notion and luxury of traveling (which Sal and I have been extremely lucky to have been doing much of this past year) made it seem really real that I was in fact, a responsible human being that can handle myself both mentally and financially on my own.
I think that there are certain milestones most of us hit that provide reality-check points in life: graduation from high school, turning 21, graduating college, moving into a first apartment, starting a first job (second job, third job), marriage, owning a home, having a first child, etc. We have these intense moments throughout life that follow the path of age, but I don’t know that any necessarily give that aha! moment of feeling like an adult aside from having a child (I hear that is a big ‘ol OMG-I-am-old-enough-to-do this moment). Legally we are all adults at 18, but mentally it hits each of us at different times.
Suddenly, I want to ask everyone I know, “When was the moment you realized you were a grown up? That you felt like you were single handedly the person in charge of what happens how and when? How did you know?” It’s thought provoking… And I love it that Sally and I both felt it at the same time in our lives – after we had spent days hanging out with just each other. We navigated a somewhat confusing city with public transportation like woah, and did it all on our own with just a map and trusty iPhones. Some of our best moments this weekend were spent while we were sitting on benches in San Francisco, people watching and staring at the scenery, taking it all in and leisurely talking. It was honestly some of the most easy and calm time we have spent together that the two of us could remember.
The only two scheduled events of the entire trip was our long and lazy brunch with Julia and the celebration of Victoria and Joe’s wedding reception… Talking to Julia about life and work made us connect with her even more – we both walked away smiling about how much we had in common with her (mostly due to her sweet appearance but feisty attitude and similarities in family dynamics). She might be younger than us but she has an old soul and intelligence that makes her seem years older. And of course, seeing our dear friends so full of love in post-wedding bliss was beyond special… Sharing in their milestone at one of the most personal receptions I’ve ever been to is something I won’t forget. I’m telling you – the weekend turned out to be as profound as it was relaxing. Something we didn’t except but fully welcomed.
So if you feel so inclined, I would love to hear your aha! moment that made you realize you were a full-fledged adult… And if you’re still waiting for it I suggest you keep enjoying life till it hits you over the head when you least expect it.
(Image via Andy Heart)
I am starting to hit some of these milestone (turned 21 two months ago), about to graduate college in the spring and then the job search…OYE! Great talk today!
Thank you guys so so much for being there! I'm glad you had an amazing time — I had an amazing time dancing with you.
I'm also so happy you loved your first trip to California!!!!!
i'm only twenty, but living on my own in a foreign country for four months this year really proved to me that i can take care of myself. i didn't have a roommate, i financed my whole way through, i figured out how to get from point a-b-c-z on my own. taking care of myself in every way possible was a huge step, especially being on a different continent than my friends and family. i came back home with so much more confidence, which has helped me progress and feel secure anywhere.
Another great Toast Talk series! I have to admit – I got married in January 2011 and at the time I thought "this is it – I'm an adult"….. but 10 days ago we purchased our first home and I think this feels more adult than getting married! Ironically, I think when we have children – I will again feel "more adult" than I do today…. funny how that works!
Oddly, I haven't felt that moment yet, but the closest I've come is probably when I packed up and moved to AK (which required a looong flight by myself with my pup). And I'd totally love some Cali time right about now…
The month I realized that the only thing left my parents were paying for was my Toll Tag bill was when I felt like a grown up… I sort of had an oh em gee moment when I realized I was doing good job of taking care of myself on my own.
I've been feeling like a real grown up lately. I've been working at a job for almost two years that really leaves me uninspired, and for the first time, I've started making changes to get me closer to the life I actually want. I think I had that aha! moment when I realized, I can do anything I want, and live anywhere I choose, because I'm the one who's in control now. It's inspiring and it's scary, but we're all in it together.
Sounds like such a fun trip! So jealous you get to spend those moments with your sister! I have a younger brother I'm really close to–but it's not the same! I think I've had a few of those a'ha moments. Mostly when I've traveled alone overseas and navigated NYC all alone after my trusty iphone died! I still have a little growing up to do tho..lol Love these posts!
xx
Giovanna
http://www.oliveandanarrow.com
Hello Ladies,
To be honest I tend to skip over the text of a lot of blogs (most of them actually). Sometimes I just like looking at pretty things! But I always take the time to read the full content. It's never generic or canned feeling, it is always uniquely you (both of you). Maybe reading full sentences means I'm an adult! haha
But seriously the day I first felt like an adult was the day my friend from college told me she was pregnant. Honestly sheer panic was my first reaction and then I realized, we're adults, she's married and now I'm going to be friends with a mom?!? wow! If that doesn't throw you right into adulthood I don't know what will!
Thanks for all the great content (and pretty pictures)
I'm so happy you brought this up today in Toast Talk, over the last few months I've been feeling very much like an adult, being on my own, being financially independent and responsible. But the big one, my bestest friend asked me to be a bridesmaid and I couldn't help but tearing up but it was then, it hit me like a ton of bricks! I didn't realize oh were old enough to be getting married now and here other other half of me is marrying the man of her dreams and I'm going to be apart of the celebration of these two lovely people.
I had such a blast with you two! I could have sat over lunch for hours and hours. I'm so glad you guys had a great weekend (and Victoria's wedding looked amazing). I can't wait to see you guys again…hopefully soon!
Julia
There's been plenty of different things that have made me feel like a real adult, each one seeming to top the other. Most recently it was my move to Chicago. I remember sitting in the kitchen and just telling my parents that I was doing it. And they looked at me and just said, okay, it's your decision. I still felt a little weird not having to ask for their permission at age 24. Haha!
I think the first time I felt like I had truly hit adult-hood was when I held our baby for the first time. No longer was it just all about me…my needs, my time, my travels, my finances it was about him. How will we take care of him, nurture him and raise him? It brings being an adult to a whole new level when this tiny little baby is totally dependent on you. It was one of the most amazing, and frightening moments in my life. Definitely a game changer
Sounds like your trip was fantastic, can't wait to see pics!
Is it weird that I feel like I have these moments all of the time? I constantly have a moment where I think, "Wow, this is a grown-up decision" or "Wow, I sound like my mom." haha.
Lexi @ Glitter, Inc.